I got up — he was still asleep — got dressed, quietly packed a bag with some essentials, packed another bag with essentials for my then-two-year-old daughter, got her out of her crib, and fled.
I had been working through my own career stress with a sexist boss, and finally I found my own new job and came up for air. I met and married an amazing guy and we have a beautiful little boy turning two next month. In addition, two others girls that were interested in him kept inserting themselves into our relationship. I was 27 at the time and the fault of the marriage failing lay on both sides. We were Sandy victims, and he claims that experience contributed to his decision.
I thought it was sentimental to end the relationship where it first began, but Robert saw it as a low-blow. No call, nono text message, nothing. I invited him to the local park where our relationship first started. Robert was good to me.
I was shocked. It also made me realize that I was not cut out for a non-monogamous relationship.
Maybe I should have been paying attention to bgoke work, too? To this day, I am convinced I mourned hij relationship in reverse, meaning, I was a mess for three months, THEN made my move, and then cried some more only this time it was only for two days. I broke up with him and said I hope you and her have a great life together. I heard through the grapevine that he was heartbroken, and I carried that emotional weight with me for the first few weeks of school.
When I asked him to stop being so overly cute with me, he did — even though it wasn't the way he preferred to show his love and affection. When I told him I wanted to end it before heading back to school, he was shocked and abruptly told me to brokke, so I did. It turns out it was his ex-girlfriend, and she explained that while he and I were dating, they were sleeping together.
At the end of the day, it rboke for the best.
My only option was to close that chapter and turn the. Anyway, it led to a long discussion about expectations and the future and what we wanted in a marriage, and I realized how little overlap there was. I could have gone on and on for months acting like my feelings were just a result of my "commitment phobia.
In all honestly, I didn't entirely understand why I felt the way I did. I was 26 then and have wanted to be a mom practically my whole life, and this was brand new information. Ending a year relationship was probably the hardest decision I ever made, but it was the right one. Not to mention, he'd been broken up with at that park once before. I dumped him I was 34 at the time.
Never wants to be a dad? I will never forget that day. And I cried, a lot. Robert treated me hlm way most partners would want to be treated.
We kept in touch after I graduated and, somehow, became even better friends after I left for college. That park had become a happy place for him, and I took that away. When I told him I wanted him to text me more often, he did. When he asked me why, the only reason I could give was that I felt like something was missing. There was never one defining moment where I realized it wasn't going to work with Robert.
Lindy Lewis, a Banking from Breakup coach and expert, helps women become more powerful, confident, and happier versions of themselves following their break up. After I broke up with him, he immediately got a job. In my quest to do this, he hung up the phone on me. After that, I wrote him a long saying it was over, that he needed to find some self-loveand that I didn't deserve to be treated that way.
Updated: Oct. I knew then, and I brome now, that he deserves someone who wants to be with him, and I deserve to be with someone I genuinely want to be with, too. But nothing.
But I needed to accept the fact that the relationship just wasn't working out on my own. Having an innocent crush didn't feel like enough for me to end my current relationship. I was just trying to help, not have him act likebe uncommunicative, and hang up on me!
It was painful. It didn't matter that nothing was wrong, wth that Robert was the textbook perfect boyfriend. He always did the most he could for me and for us. Even though I loved this man, this was a huge violation of my boundary and I could no longer trust him uup be honest with me or keep me safe. He always took my feelings into consideration. He'd come to me for advice, and I would go to him, too.
But, in hindsight, it was the best 45th birthday gift they could have ever given me. Actually, I was grateful. The moment I realized I had to leave was when we witg at the dinner table in front of a meal I had cooked — without his help — in which he took a break from playing video games from to eat as per usual. Of course Wihh was sad; I'd lost my boyfriend and best friend in the same night.
While he told me that he was having dates with a particular woman, I found out AFTER the fact that they were having sex. I wish he had just admitted his wrongdoings and at least apologized. Instead I got radio silence — that was it.